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May 4, 2022 11:34 PM

what I want

Last week, I went on a company sponsored vacation to San Diego. I honestly wasn't excited about it at all. Maybe a little anxious. I don't like travelling, and I just wanted to get it over with. We had "fun activities" that we signed up for, but they didn't really appeal to me. I didn't have to attend, but it just seemed like the socially acceptable thing to do.

When I got to the airport and walked over to the terminal, I saw several of my co-workers standing in a circle. They were getting on an earlier flight. I also passed by another co-worker to waved over to me, and I sat with him for a little bit as we waited for our boarding times. As the day went on, I saw more and more co-workers. When I finally arrived at the hotel in San Diego, I saw people that I hadn't seen in person in over two years. And a wave of energy just hit me. I rushed up to my hotel room, dropped off my stuff, quickly changed into shorts, and in less than ten minutes I was back downstairs in the hotel lobby, chatting it up with my co-workers.

Those three days in San Diego were absolutely exhausting, and I barely got any sleep. The food was decent, but nothing amazing. The activities were fine enough. But the people. The people made it absolutely worth it.

What I love about my job isn't the fact that I solve challenging problems and write code. It's the incredibly smart, interesting, and friendly people that I get to interact with. And I've known this for years, but the pandemic had largely taken that away. I'm glad I was reminded of it during this trip.

---

In the old iteration(s) of this blog, around 2015-2018, I would always talk about my goals. I wanted to save money, to learn more, to be a more productive person. My life was centered around the things I wanted to accomplish. Lately, I've had a few conversations that have made me think about what I want in my life. Right now, I don't think I want to accomplish anything. I just want to do things that will make me happy.

But most importantly, I want to spend time with others. I could do all those things, but if I couldn't share my experiences with friends and family then it wouldn't make me happy at all.

Life is still kind of a mess right now, with lots of ups and downs. But I'm slowly getting out more, and reaching out to people more. It's way more effort than it used to be just to see people, but I'm going to try as hard as I can to make it happen.


March 20, 2022 1:51 PM

First day of spring

There are two things that make me proud to be part of something. One of them is success. The other is the times you spend with people, having truly quirky moments. The moments that make me forget that stupid things like American Idol exist.

- me, 12 years ago

I was a senior in high school and I was in the indoor drumline. We had a competition that morning, and we were really happy with our performance.

It was also the first day of spring, so a few of us celebrated by going to Rita's. That was fun, so we decided to go to another Rita's. And another. And another. We finished our round of Rita's at the local mall. Since it was spring, the Easter bunny was around and we all took a picture together.

My next door neighbor was also in the drumline, so we drove to his house, but we weren't ready for the day to end yet. We all stood in a circle in the driveway and asked ourselves, "What should we do now?" Standing there, it felt like we contemplated forever.

One of my friends really wanted to go bike riding, but there were 7 of us. Where were we going to get enough bikes? We ended up driving all around town to some of our houses and our friends' houses to pick up bikes from different places until we had one for each of us to use.

Right when we started riding, we had to cross the street to get to the park, and I nearly got hit by a car. But I was fine. We got to the park and we rode around and I was incredibly slow and lagging behind everyone. Once we got tired of riding, we all went swimming in the creek. I've never really been a huge fan of bike riding or swimming, and I'm not really good at either, but man, it was so much fun.

Somehow, only 5 hours had elapsed throughout our adventures that day. It truly felt like the best day ever.


February 10, 2022 8:33 PM

A day for my dad

Today, I


February 10, 2022 9:26 AM

My mobile app code is on github

Yesterday I took a day of PTO and spent a couple of hours on my mobile app. This is what came out of it:


December 31, 2021 2:19 PM

2021

I thought 2020 threw my system out of whack. I had high highs and low lows, but looking back at it, 2020 was pretty chill. Sure, the pandemic started, but at least it forced me to stay home. I didn't have to think about it. I traveled less, and I spent a lot of time with my sister.

2021 was a lot. I had even higher highs and lower lows. I've been so emotional and stressed out this year that it affected my sleep. And I had never had trouble with sleep before. Sleep was something I could count on. But then I had three weeks of barely any sleep, and months of waking up without an alarm. I used to think that being able to wake up without an alarm was a thing to strive for. Now, it's a little comforting to hear it.

But the sleep issues were only the beginning. I got promoted to a managerial position, and then several months later demoted myself. My dad suddenly experienced a lot of pain, and it changed the course of his life, taking up more of my time and headspace than I could have ever anticipated. But I also got to know a really wonderful person by going on lots of walks and eating lots of ice cream. I've learned and fumbled a lot throughout all of this, and I'm still learning and fumbling and flailing.

Sometimes it feels like all of my time is taken up by working, doing chores, running errands, and helping others, and I barely have any time for any of my own projects. But somehow I'm still able to get a few things done for myself. I beat Elite Beat Agents. I finally managed to do a 10 mile run. I learned some Android mobile app programming, and I made an app for my food blog. And every once in a while I make updates to this site.

I usually make New Year's resolutions, but I'm not quite sure I need something to focus on right now. Maybe I'll keep working on the mobile app. Maybe this year I'll finally get back to Programming Pearls or learning Teochew. Maybe I'll get strong enough to do a push up. We'll see.

I'm happy with the past year, and I'm looking forward to the year to come.


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